The New, New, New, Superman Arrives – But Does the Whore That Is Cinema Still Love Me?

Oh, hello cinema. What’s that you got behind your back attached to that very massive marketing campaign? Come on, let us see. What’s this? Another Superman film? Another film to explain how a character that’s been talked about our whole lives came about? But cinema, surely now we understand it. Don’t we? No? Hang on, I’m pretty […]

Read More The New, New, New, Superman Arrives – But Does the Whore That Is Cinema Still Love Me?

Me, Prince & Him

There I was, leisurely strolling across the rain-strewn South bank of London.  The streetlights bounced at me as my feet navigated the puddles.  Incoherent shouts of traffic tried to penetrate my ears, which were otherwise engaged with the sounds of Prince.  He was telling a story about a girl who owned a beret that tasted […]

Read More Me, Prince & Him

A Rub & A Hard Place

Don’t get a boner.  Don’t get a boner.  Don’t get a boner. It’s not often I recite these words.  But, in these circumstances, it deemed necessary.  A woman was rubbing my body from head to toe.  Her fingertips taking charge of my naked skin.  If ever there was a reason for the blood to rush […]

Read More A Rub & A Hard Place

Right Royal Deathmocracy

I don’t know what makes me nauseate more; watching Eastenders or the Royal wedding.  Both cost the taxpayers a lot of money.  Both appear in the press far too much.  And both contain an overwhelming number of characters who are related to each other. Having said that, Eastenders provides a lot more death.  Something I […]

Read More Right Royal Deathmocracy